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No matter how hard I've tried, from now, it almost been one full month that my mom got his health in the bad side of the force. The thing is, since then, I've been struggling and haven't been really well. You might have noticed (or not) that I was totally "away" from the internet lately. Not only twitter, but also my own blog or even Facebook, I was looking at stuff times to times, but was staying away of anything. Most important fact is that from one month ago to right now (I do it again a little bit now), I haven't listened to GACKT at all.
You probably think that it's not a too big deal, but from me, it clearly means I'm not feeling well. I wasn't also looking at any new stuff of him except what popped-up right onto my eyes. It's not that I lost interest in him, just that I didn't had the energy to start being into anything lately ...

In order to start on a good point, I decided to participate to the Secret Santa from
ohgacktyoudidnt community, it's a sort of christmas project who might be fun. I hope it will be a good experience, some of you may know that my feelings for Christmas aren't really positive, so let's try to change that ... somehow ...

On the other side, I'm broke as always, but really really much, not a little. It means that I won't probably be able to get the Diary 2013 of GACKT (it makes me sad because it's not like a CD you can easely buy later), his latest Hakuro single or even the upcoming YFC dvd and everything. I'm just broke as hell, and it makes me depressed to always ask my mother when I want something, just like a child. I also avoid as much as possible to ask her for anything, because she's not rich either ... =___='

Anyway, that's what my life looks like lately, great isn't it ?
I cry, not only from the outside but also deep inside, because of my mother's health, my own situation (jobless) that I can't go out because of my health (still nothing have been found), doctors around us who are total dumbasses, and a bad luck in general. So I try to find some positive vibes, but seems like they are everywhere except near me ...

Comments are opened, but might be closed ... I still don't know yet ... ^^'

Current Mood: draineddrained
Current Music: GACKT - 情熱のイナズマ